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    Dating within the aa program

    After dating one dud after another, you finally find someone who seems to have it all – thoughtful, witty, responsible – and good-looking to boot.

    Then they drop a bomb: “I used to be a drug addict.” They may as well have said, “I’m married.” But does one partner being in recovery automatically spell doom for a relationship?

    Occasionally, very occasionally, it’s a different story. Chips with everything AA is crazy about chips – or 'sobriety coins'. No two groups are the same Because AA is self-organising at the grass roots level, groups define themselves differently. Others are ‘participation meetings’, where everyone has a chance to share. There are men only meetings, women only meetings, and meetings for any variety of LGBT. Or so meetings like to chant at the end of the session, after reciting the Serenity Prayer. But it’s a refrain in the fellowship that AA works better than aversive medicine (the dreaded antabuse, Ebola in tablet form), white coats (cognitive intelligence therapy), or sermons from self-appointed experts who’ve never themselves been there but know all about it (which, alas, includes most of the medical profession. Nowadays, while sitting on appointment committees, I've seen personal statements in which the job seeker says they’ve been through AA (to counteract any mention of their drinking days in confidential letters of reference). God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, The courage to change the things I can, And the wisdom to know the difference.

    Keep it simple Supposedly the last words of AA's founder, Bill W (ilson). ‘Perhaps the Day after Tomorrow’ another proverb promises. But the rules have relaxed since the patriarchs, Bill W.

    Recovering addicts don’t expect perfection in their partners, having learned firsthand that it doesn’t exist.

    And they have committed – in recovery and in life – to honesty and integrity and making decisions in accordance with their values.

    12Step Match is the ORIGINAL Recovery Dating Web Site for Sober Men and Women Online to come for Sober Dates, Love or Friends and Support and to search within your own 12 Step Program of Recovery.

    Whether it be AA Singles, NA Singles, Al-Anon Singles, GA, OA…

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